According to Henry James, the two most beautiful words in
the English language are ‘summer afternoon.’ I agree, but would like to add
‘Summer afternoon with ice cream in hand while watching hot, buff men playing
Frisbee in the park. Shirtless. Oh, and I look about 10 pounds thinner.’ Yeah,
the romance languages ain’t got nothing on us.
Glacier is the Tiger Woods of ice cream; the Ron Jeremy,
the Chuck Norris. It’s just the best there is and it kicks – or penetrates –
the competition’s ass. Like many other ice cream parlors, they make all of
their 800 flavors of ice cream in-house. But the TLC doesn’t stop there – they
also concoct their own hot fudge, gelato and chocolate mix-ins. Stores
typically have 80 flavors on-hand at a time, enough to send one of those
annoying lactose-intolerants to their grave. But my God would they die happy! Try
the Death by Chocolate, White Chocolate Wally Biscotti 3D Fudge and Peanut
Butter Blast.
Bonnie Brae is what you imagine an ice cream shop looked
like before the likes of Dairy Queen and Cold Stone infiltrated the
market. Its adorable red and white motif
and candy-striper-esque uniforms for its employees are so 1950s style that
you’ll be cursing those damn Soviets for winning the space race instead of
praising them for breeding hot tennis players. They make all your fave
warm-weather treats, from malts to sundaes to Italian sodas. But nothing says bliss quite like an ice
cream cone. One scoop Oreos and Cream,
one scoop Amaretto Peach and you’ll be on your way to summertime ecstasy.
If variety is the spice of life, than the frozen custard
at CJ’s is spiced just about as well as the menu at Taco Bell. With only three
flavors – vanilla, chocolate and flavor of the day – CJ’s doesn’t exactly give
you a lot of choices, but what they do offer is pretty damn delicious. The
White Chocolate Macadamia Nut, with real nuts mixed in, tasted like I was
eating a frozi-fied Mrs. Fields cookie. Unfortunately the atmosphere of this
place is reminiscent of a preschool. With ice cream cones painted around the
perimeter, tables and chairs designed for hobbits and enough high chairs lined
up to accommodate Brangelina’s brood, you could feel like a kid again. But then
again, that isn’t so bad.
Gelazzi
I’m not sure what it takes to get a Nobel Prize these
days, but I’m thinking that whoever came up with the idea to combine ice cream
with liquor deserves one. At Gelazzi you get more than just 32 flavors (take
that Baskin Robbins!) of homemade gelato, you also get a buzz off of their
Gelatinis. A mixture of gelato and liqueurs, the Gelatinis will have milkshakes
going to therapy for inadequacy issues. The trendy